Why single moms get taken advantage of…..

This article could easily be called, ” Whats Wrong With Fantasia?”.

The reality is that so many women, especially single moms, who have been broken by life often fall victim to guys who are looking for the next woman to manipulate… These guys enter your world, and begin to promise you the stars and moon, telling you all the wonderful things that haven’t heard about yourself in ages…buttering you up…..over and over again.

Then here comes the catch.

One night, after an evening of back and forth ” I love you, baby….” he breaks the news.

” Oh, I am waiting on my divorce to be finanlized”.

” Well, technically I am still married but I am in it just  for the kids”

and then its gets better……..because they add…

“My love, can I borrow some money? Just a few hundred $ , (or in Fantasia’s case – a few THOUSAND DOLLARS), until next week.”

And because you are NOT in a position of a clear mind, I  mean who could blame you? Its hard to come off of the high of having your heads stuck in the clouds for a few weeks….You reason it all away to just bad timing or even worse luck.

You tell yourself, ” He’s a good guy….just going through a hard time. Why would I let a good man slip away over some unsigned paperwork….thats all a divorce is anyway, right?”


This is the time my dear where you should RUN LIKE THE WIND. Any decent man would not involve you (if he really loves you), or his kids (if he really loves them) into an already intense situation. A decent man recognizes that a family separation is traumatic, and he still has an obligation to move on (if that is what he is really trying to do…) in PEACE.

Ladies, how many times are we going to sell ourselves short chasing after or holding on to “messy men”. You have to believe that you are worth better than that. You have to love yourself and your kids…better than that. You have to know that if he really is the one for you then love will remain while he gets himself together.

STOP being sooooooo desperate for “a man” that “any” man will do. Have a standard. Have a wise heart. Have enough hope inside of you to not let someone derail your life, your plans. and your purpose.

Real Talk. ~ Ebony Smiles