How to love…

I actually found out about the song from my daughter. Its a change in format of sorts for the artist, rapper Lil’Wayne. Although he is a mega super star and known around the world for rapping – this time he changed his tune. I can only imagine that he thought this message was so important – its content so relevant and real – that he had to get everyone’s attention. And he did.

Lil’Wayne’s song “How to Love” is about a young women who sells herself – mind, body, and soul – short for attention, money, and love because she’s never shown how to love. The young girl comes from a broken home, where she’s abused by a male figure, her father is in prison, and her mother seems uninterested. She grows up only to continue the cycle of damaged relationships and broken dreams – only to find out, that now she has HIV.

Then Lil’ Wayne so elequently flips the script. He takes the same young girl and this time puts her in a loving family. Her parents are around and involved in her. She has learned to love and respect herself and in turn demands that love and respect from others – because someone was there to teach her growing up “How to Love”. Her life will continue on with the love, hope, and support every young girl is due because she’s been brought up by people who cared enough to show her again, “How to love”.

I find it strangely ironic, that one of the biggest rappers in mainstream music and media right now has to put out this message that really should be coming from the pulpits of the world. This rapper is saying to all of us – Hey, we are losing are daughters. They are dying spiritually, emotionally, and even physically because we aren’t giving them to tools to make it. We aren’t showing them love. We aren’t showing the guidance. We are not protecting them. We are not being examples of love for them – and as a result, our daughters and sons are self destructing…

I may not ever agree with anything Lil’Wayne ever does again – but for this one moment we all owe him big. He has used his platform as a wake up call to all the parents whose children aren’t their top priority. A notice of default to all the women who slip men in and out of the bedrooms at night, thinking their daughters aren’t watching. A warning to all of the men who leave their kids subject to predators while they themselves jump from sheet to sheet and jail to jail.

We are losing our youth – if we as parents, don’t take this moment to show them how to and even how NOT to love.

The different between the girl who makes it in the song and the one who doesn’t is parental involvement. If you know what’s going on – or at least try your best too – I believe it makes a difference. We can’t turn a blind’s eye and just forget about these kids. We are leaving them to raise themselves, and they cannot.

Rather you had both parents or just one, or maybe even none at all – you have the ability RIGHT NOW to make sure that your teen comes through their childhood and adolescence okay. All you have to do is love.

Love gives. Love cares. Love shows. Love listens. Love doesn’t judge. Love tries to understand. Love is constant. Love is an unselfish GUIDE of life.

I hope as parents, we get it that our love for our teens or kids could be the catalyst the pushes them into a promising future – or the missing link, the sends them full speed into a lonely world of hurt, self destruction, and despair.

– Mz. Koddi
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